Valuable Lesson

I don’t have the stomach this week to write about the trials and tribulations of the Greece bailouts (I’ll have more time to write about this in the future because there will be many more…), I don’t care to write about the non-stop meetings between Germany and France to talk about everyone else (I’m starting to think they don’t like to cook and just want free meals…), and I don’t feel like writing about how the stock market keeps going up even though only a few stocks are behind it (Apple should soon be worth all of Europe combined…).  What I do want to write about is what I believe to be one of life’s greatest lessons, which can actually be learned from our very own children.

Kids are hands down the best negotiators around.  You and I as parents might get frustrated by their actions sometimes, but if we take a minute to analyze what’s going on, we can all learn a valuable lesson.

Short story.  Just the other night when putting my daughter to bed, she requested I read her a book before going to sleep.  We were getting to bed a little later than normal that evening on a school night and so I had told her that not tonight, but we could certainly read a book the next night (this is all code for I just felt like heading back downstairs to start watching some of my favorite television shows).

Thinking ever so quickly on her feet, she immediately replied, “Can we just read part of a book?”  A seemingly meaningless question, but she was setting me up and I didn’t even realize it. My response to this was to simply try and reaffirm my earlier response by restating the fact that it was late and time to get to sleep.

Like water off a duck’s back, her next question was, “Well then what if we just read a few pages?”  Now she was just playing with me.  She was starting to ask me open ended questions as opposed to simple yes/no type questions.  My 6-year old professional negotiator was now toying with me.

So now I really had to dig me heels in and firmly stated that it was way past her bedtime and there was absolutely no time left to read a book.  Without hesitation (and I even think she chuckled under her breath as she laughed at my shear ignorance as to how she was manipulating me), she responded, “What if we just read one page?”

As a now worn down adversary I responded, “Ok, we’ll read a few pages and then it’s time to get to sleep.  What book do you want to read?”  She replied, “Hell if I care, you pick…”

In life, “No” simply means no to the specific question asked, but may not mean “No” to a slightly modified question (please don’t take this to extreme, there are certain situations where you should respect “No” as the final answer…).  Kids understand this point better than anyone; however, as adults many times we hear “No” and quickly think it’s the end of the conversation.  In life, don’t take “No” for an answer!

Next article, it’s time to start talking more about the economy and the impact it will have on your treasured savings.  There’s still a lot going on and a lot to discuss.  Till we meet again…

Joel Fink

Joel.fink@yahoo.com